I did some science demos in my daughter's class last week. Before I went in, I carefully typed up a lesson plan. Force! Levers! Let's lift the teacher! I imagined neat ranks of beautiful, attentive, well-behaved children hanging breathlessly on my every word.
The reality was horrifying. I encountered a room full of small, filthy savages. They pushed, they punched, they ignored all direction. The brilliant little apes moved rapidly past the lesson plan, from sedately moving fulcrums and counting out galvanized washers to fabricating primitive trebuchets. Crayons and glue sticks flew through the air. Bruises were raised, petty thefts were perpetrated, lifelong enmities began.
When it was all over, the teacher smiled at me and said, "Thanks! That went really well!"
Monday, October 19, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
10 comments:
LOL, standards are low with the little ones. No deaths, no problem! No hospitalizations, and it must be a good day!
How old are the kids? And how well do you think the outreach worked? Obviously younger are going to more unruly, but do you think you had any effect in drawing them into science careers?
"The brilliant little apes moved rapidly"!! Ha!
I'm sure at least one learned how to fling pencils into the ceiling more effectively. Did you check the ceiling?
Hey Angry P: I volunteered as "Science Guy" for my son's class for most of last year. Huge learning experience for me. My most successful encounters were when I could channel the natural physical/somatic learning style of most of the youngsters (7 and 8) into the lesson. And they loved when I brought in my laptop with lovingly crafted, highly animated PowerPoint slides and web-thefted Java doodads which showed what I was trying to get across. I was utterly unused to teaching young students. You get spoiled by undergrads and grad students.
They are remarkable little simians. I really don't understand how ANYONE could deny evolution once they've seen a gang of toddlers in action.
I had a group of 3 year olds come through the anatomy lab in our department. Seeing the cadaver was definitely out, but wow, they got a kick out of the models. They shoved each other just to look down the ear canal, and were awestruck at the skeleton. They quivered with delight at touching a bone. I have the cutest thank you note that I have framed. But thank God it lasted only 20 minutes. Hats off to elementary school and Jr. high teachers.
Assisting at the county mass vaccination clinic today only served to reinforce my gratitude that I have dogs and not children.
Used to volunteer in junior high school. Got tripped, on purpose, by a student who likely thought I was some fellow student inmate.
Took young lady down to the office, where I was told, "What do you want us to do? If we call her parents, they'll tell us to deal with it."
Right.
Please continue to try. The savages need taming.
Ha, ha, ha. Another visit or two, they'll all hug you when you come in the door.
That was a hilarious, yet frighteningly accurate description of grade schoolers! Makes me happy I didn't go into peds!
Post a Comment