Monday, September 29, 2008

Has anyone seen this one before?

So I'm in the ladies' room sitting on a toilet when someone else came in and entered the stall next to me. As I finished my business, an expensive, flowery smell filled the air. "Wow!" I thought to myself. "That's quite an improvement over my usual business! I wonder what I could have eaten..."

Of course my poop still stinks the same as everyone else's. The young lady in the stall next door was frantically spritzing perfume into the air as she pooped, apparently so that I might be fooled into thinking that her poop, literally, smells like roses.

14 comments:

Miss Kitty said...

That is priceless. But at least the young lady had the decency to try to spare you from the doody smell. I always feel funny about dropping a big one if someone else is in the restroom with me...I know they could identify my shoes if they wanted to. "Boy, Prof. Kitty's ass is PUTRID!"

Someone FINALLY put a big can of Oust in our faculty ladies' room recently...bless them. :-)

Niki said...

The only thing worse than the smell of poo by itself is the olfactory assault that is poo competing with perfume.

Maybe next time slip the poor girl a book of matches.

Anonymous said...

Ah, but try having only one bathroom on your cinderblock office corridor, and being assigned the office right next door to it. Not only do you know _when_ your colleagues need to go, but exactly what everything sounds like.

Then top it off by being greeted by your department chair as he goes back to his office.

reine said...

that's a nice one!. Reine.

The_Myth said...

Am I the only one who suspects the young lady "next door" was trying to cover up the already-present odor so she could do her business in olfactory pleasance?

;-)

Not Important said...

Maybe your stall neighbor was responsible for this sign.

Carina said...

I grew up with three older brothers. I'd rather smell perfume than teen boy funk plus bathroom odors. I really hated sharing a bathroom with them in high school.

Aidan said...

I can't imagine working in a building where the men's toilet vented into an office. Aren't their OSHA standards?

Jemima Jones Beck said...

What always makes me laugh are the women who toot while doing their business in the public restroom and then say "excuse me" in an incredibly embarraed voice. I always want to let them know that its ok, this is where you are SUPPOSED to toot.

Miss Kitty said...

Four days later, I'm STILL laughing about this post. :-P Sorry. I must still be 12.

Anonymous said...

What I wished is that my students would have the decency to place air fresheners in their folders as most of their papers stink.

Anonymous said...

This story lends new meaning to the expression, "She must be really anal."

Dr. A said...

Hilarious!!

Anonymous said...

what?!

As a male, I was always positive that girls poop puppies and daisies. Actually, I refuse to accept that they actually poop.

nope, impossible!