From: Scarlett #1
To: Angry Professor
Subject: ESP and Aliens
Hello,
I'm trying to graduate next quarter and just found out I need an upper-division class. this one fits in my schedule and I was really hoping you would let me still add the class even though it's the third week. As long as all I've missed is readings I know I can catch up. I will come to class tommarow and speak with you futhur.
Scarlett #1
From: Scarlett #2
To: Angry Professor
Subject: ESP and Aliens
I was hoping i could still add this class. I know this it is the third week but i really need another class. My friend Scarlett #1 is trying to add the class and me and her could catch up together. I will attend your class tommarow to discuss this more. Please let me know asap. Thanks - Scarlett #2
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
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14 comments:
Last week I had someone trying to add in the 6th week.
Denied.
Seriously. The whole "I need this class because it fits into my schedule" song and dance is such a crock. Why don't the academic advisors tell people that?
Interesting. They both misspell "tomorrow" the same way. Are they (MZ) twins?
Johan, I don't think so. But that was my title motivation.
As a recent student and someone with student friends, I know many people like this. They don't plan ahead and don't have a decent plan for their future, either. You should deny them because their only interest is to graduate, not to actually learn the topic. Furthermore, they should have to stay at the school longer to take a course in gramer, speling, and learning how to use a pslel chekker. :)
Dear Marathon Race Coordinator,
I realized that I need to run a marathon before I turn 40, because I wrote it down on my list of things to do when I was in high school. I understand that we are currently past the first hour of the race, but I was wondering if you would let me start at mile 12? I ran 12 miles yesterday, so I know that I won't be behind.
Sincerely,
Random Goon
These comments are cracking me up. :-)
I had students e-mailing me in the 4th and 5th week of the semester--CLUELESS. I usually e-mail back that the class has already "gelled" and there's NO way they'll be able to fit in/catch up/have a snowball's chance in hell.
Don't do it! The Scarlett's never ever turn out to be worth the hassle. I've learned the hard way
Dear Angry Professor,
Never mind. I realized that if I've reached my senior year of college without learning to spell "tomorrow" properly I must be living on borrowed time. The gods would only preserve such a moron for so long in order to visit upon her a cruel fate.
I've decided to leave LSU and spend whatever days remain living on a remote mountaintop in Asia eating weeds and praying for the enlightenment of the world.
Also, I'm sorry I suggested that you couldn't possibly offer in your lectures anything not covered in the reading. I only did it because I am a complete dumbass.
With deepest apologies,
Scarlett
PS Which way is Asia?
After reading Franklin's brilliant snark, I got a little sad.
Students like the Scarletts never learn their lesson. And, even worse, they get the same degree as someone who did the work, cared, showed up, but may not have graduated with honors.
And the system at most colleges seems to be starting to favor the little snowflakes instead of making them grow up.
Ah...extended adolescence. Soon it'll reach 30! [if not already]
Dear Scarletts 1 & 2 --
You may have entrance if you acknowledge -- in writing -- that you understand the following:
a) There is no way, statistically speaking, that you can pull an "A" (or even a "B+) out of your ass after missing so many classes,
and
b) If you miss so much as 1/10 of one more class, you'll earn yourself an "F" for poor attendance.
Smooooches.
AP
My department features a great attendance policy. Miss 20% of classes, automatically fail. So my response to these students would be simple: Sure, you can sign up, but you've missed 20% of the course so far, so you can earn no better than an F for the course according to department policy. Sorry!
"Tommarow"
I've seen it spelled "tomarrow" which isn't quite as bad but still drives me up the wall. I even know a whole family who spells it like this, including half- and step-siblings. They're all reinforcing each other's delusion!
I wonder if there's a glitch in the T9 database (txt msg word completion on cell phones) that accepts this. Or does T9 "learn" from use? Because otherwise you'd think they'd wonder why they had to keep going back to "correct" the word....
Word verification: shtsnhw. Shitsnow?
Wow. Please tell me you wrote these students to tell them they would fail your class anyway due to their inabilities to spell common words correctly.
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